You’re getting divorced, and your biggest concern is the children. You don’t mind sharing custody with your ex at all. You’re on good terms and you both want to put the kids first. You just feel bad about making the children move to a new home. You don’t want them to lose this safe space, their class at school, their friends in the neighborhood and all the rest.
Could “nesting” be the parenting and custody option you need?
What is nesting?
One solution could be to keep your family home and simply have the children stay there. Don’t make them move at all. This can make the transition to post-divorce life far easier for them. If that’s your ultimate goal, this solution can get it done.
In a nesting situation, the parents to move in and out of the family home, rotating according to the custody schedule instead of having the kids rotate homes. If your ex has custody, you move out and they move in. This could mean, for example, that you both spend every other week in the family home.
The catch is that you still need another place to live during the weeks when your ex is with the children, and they need a place to live when you’re with the kids. This can make nesting more costly than other tactics, but it does put the children first. Some parents share an apartment, rotating through much like they do the family home — but that option isn’t right for everyone.
Your options when custody is important
Nesting is a unique solution that doesn’t work for everyone, but it’s worth considering if it sounds like something that could be valuable to your family. You just need to explore all of your options carefully. An experienced advocate can guide you.