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People think that domestic violence is always visible from the outside — but many cases of domestic violence may never include physical abuse. Some individuals go through emotional and mental abuse at the hands of their spouses. This is often the case when one spouse is narcissistic

A narcissist can only think about themselves. They want everyone around them to do what they want and give them their way. They often turn to manipulative methods to make this happen. Unfortunately for the victim, this means being stuck in a cruel cycle that rotates between mental abuse and being doted upon.

Leaving a narcissistic spouse isn’t easy. They are going to fight you every step of the way. Once they find out that you’re planning a divorce, they’ll likely try to make it appear as though they were the perfect spouse. Their tactics might include telling outright lies. 

Trying to handle a narcissist during a divorce takes finesse because they gain power from feeling as though they are in control. In the case of a divorce, they will try to make you suffer from their decisions. They will purposefully say and do things they know will irritate or enrage you. In order to keep that power from them, you can have all communication go through your attorney. 

Because of the narcissist’s inability to compromise and negotiate, you’ll likely have to go through a divorce trial instead of being able to use an alternative method like mediation. They’ll also take the ability to force a trial as a win. They likely assume that the financial cost to you and dragging the divorce out are hurting you immeasurably. 

If you’re divorcing an emotionally abusive narcissist, you need to prepare yourself. Alert your attorney so they can begin to employ tactics to protect your rights in the case.